FOOLSFEST '05:  A RIVER RAN THROUGH IT
The Foolsfest was more of a flood fest.  The Happy Valley-sponsored
tournament was held near Juniata College despite torrential rains that
produced an actual stream on the pitch (there were also lakes, ponds and
other bodies of water in evidence).  The "goalposts" were works of art.
One set was fairly normal -- but narrow. The other -- three saplings
duct-taped together -- had to be seen to be believed.  It was a replica
of William Webb Ellis' first set of posts with uprights less than 10
feet apart.
Old Gaelic got muddy but not bloody in taking a pair of victories (but
apparently no hardware) and the Foolsfest crown (a dunce cap?).
The Black and Gold defeated Happy Valley, 24-5, and bested Wiles Barre,
14-0, in the truncated nightcap. The wins ran the Griffins record to 4-0
to set up a showdown at Division II power Rocky Gorge next Saturday.
Both teams were bogged down early.  After several empty forays in the
red zone, Skipper Dan Roth got things started with a 30-meter dropkick
that split the crudely fashioned uprights at the east end of the
"stadium" and left the crowd in awe. 
"He can put it in a peach basket," claimed an onlooker.
The Grifs increased their lead to 10-0 at halftime when Pete Sharpe fell
on an errant Baba aerial and Roth tacked on the conversion.
The slim lead held through the second half until Roth scooped up a loose
ball and fed John Kroesen for the try with 13 minutes remaining. Valley
got on the board with a try to cut it to 17-5, but Brian Ogle performed
his best Freddie Adu imitation when he kicked it twice and fell on the
ball for the clincher.
The clash with Wilkes Barre was a 40-minute half.  The Breakers played
well, but Old Gaelic finally broke through when Scott Donohue found mud
on a fly hack and Ogle made the scoop and ensuing scamper for five
points.  Roth tacked on an impressive conversion -- again splitting the
hand-fashioned uprights -- that wowed the collegiate onlookers (Juniata
defeated Penn State's B team, 10-7, between the Gaelic triumphs).  Roth
finished the day's offensive output when he walked on water through the
Breakers on a quick take.
Old Gaelic 24 - Happy Valley 5
T:  Sharpe, Kroesen, Ogle. A: Roth.  C: Roth 3.  DK: Roth.
Old Gaelic 14 - Wilkes Barre 0
T: Ogle, Roth.  C: Roth 2.
HAPPY VALLEY
1 Matty Graham, Travis Smith
2 Scott Donohue
3 Dave Dimitrovich/Frank Lentz
4 Matt Hart
5 Nick Adams/Galen Landis/Ted
6 Ken Ivey
7 Matt Pomraning/Adams
8 Curtis Brillhart
9 Pete Sharpe/Tom Marasciullo
10 Dan Roth
11 Wes Beard/Brian Ogle
12 John Kroesen
13 Mark Cooley/Scott Lindsay
14 Dan Gallucci
15 Brian Ramsay
WILKES BARRE
1 Smith/Lentz
2 Donohue
3 Dimitrovich
4 Landis/Ted
5 Adams/Tunis
6 Ivey
7 Pomraning
8 Brillhart
9 Marasciullo/Sharpe
10 Roth/Sharpe
11 Ogle/Gallucci
12 Kroesen
13 Lindsay
14 Beard
15 Ramsay/Ogle/Roth

NEWS & NOTES
Early scoring leaders:  Kroesen (40), Ogle (35) and Roth (29). ... The
geriatric brigade was well represented in the slop.  Mark Cooley started
at outside center and had several long runs that probed the Happy Valley
secondary.  Tom Marasciullo played solidly at scrumhalf in both games.
Tunis had a cup of coffee in the Wilkes Barre whitewashing. ...  The
Roths report that daughter Maya, age two weeks, is getting the basics
down. ...  Congratulations on Cleveland's betrothal! ... There should be
a "B" game next week.  The more the merrier!! ...